Can't you keep my hand to yourself?!
Saturday, December 31
  no, pete! stop!!

click to view this amazing video of the stupendous flying sara. note the whimpering and flailing. happy new year!! :)

Friday, December 30
  The Commando Drinking Game
I figure of my four most drunken nights, last night came in 4th place, missing the bronze by just a smidge. Johnny is currently gracing Chicago with his presence, so we played the Commando drinking game. Look it up online, you'll find a ridiculous joke of a game, having numerous cues to down as many as four shots. Thus, it simply would not do. Johnny and I revised this game, and believe we have made what is both survivable and fun. Granted, we polished off a brand new bottle of Stoli, but without a challenge where is the fun? Probably in not being really sick the next day, but smeh. So, the Commando drinking game is as follows--you take a shot when:

A member of Matrix's (Arnold's character) squad dies.
General Kirby says "World War III".
Matrix uses a farm tool to kill someone.
Cheesy 80's music begins.
Cindy freaks out.
Matrix's watch beeps really loud.

Rent the movie, play the game, see if you're a drinking commando. On a sidenote, I was so drunk last night I blacked out going to blockbuster, renting a game, playing it, wigging out and breaking a mirror. Seven years bad luck, I hope 2005 will count for one...
Thursday, December 29
I sure hope they didn't waste that meat.
When her son opened the box for the high-tech toy, he discovered the iPod that should have been there wasn't. It had apparently been replaced with some kind of mystery meat.
What I'd really like is to see the sly grin on the face of whoever was working the assembly line.
Wednesday, December 28
  Karate Kommandos!!!
This is just a sample of the greatness of Chuck Norris. Enjoy!
  Why I Love Arkansas
Drunken Thieves Caught After Wrecking Car, Flagging Down Deputy

One of the lead stories in today's Northwest Arkansas Paper, I thought you guys might enjoy...
Tuesday, December 27
  Are you kidding?
I believe I found the most asinine poll ever created. I'm amazed someone even felt this question was worth asking.

So while I'm on browsers, I'd like to know what you all are using. If you use multiple browsers, which I'm guessing many of you do, choose the one you use most often.

I should mention that this page is taking advantage of current CSS/XHTML standards that IE does not support. In fact I checked it out from a library terminal running IE a couple days ago (my first time to see the wustlog on IE) and the page was not rendered anywhere near correctly.
Monday, December 26

I thought that people might enjoy this collection of Calvin and Hobbes winter cartoons....
Sunday, December 25
  Leap second -- spend it wisely!
This year will be one second longer than the last seven!!! Hopefully you've all started planning how to best take advantage of the extra time. I know I'm looking forward to one extra sip of champagne before we bring in two oh oh six. From the article:
Time marches on, but Earth is falling behind. The solution again this year is to add a "leap second" as 2005 ticks away, so Earth can catch up with the atomic clocks that have defined time since their unerring accuracy trumped the heavens three decades ago.

This will be the first leap second in seven years, and its arrival will be closely watched by physicists and astronomers enmeshed in a prolonged debate over the future of time in a world increasingly dominated by technology.
Saturday, December 24
  'Twas the night before Christmas..
and all through Wustlog, not a person was posting, NOT EVEN Fooshee! Merry Christmas everyone! Happy Hanukkah Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Ramadan! Hope I didn't forget anything....
Thursday, December 22
So if any of you know a place I can stay in DC, let me know. But you should check out my craigslist post regardless.
Oh Steve BalmerE

Steve Ballmer "selling" windows 1.0
Wednesday, December 21
  Liquid jetpack

Man has always dreamt of flight...

  Down with GOOG!!!!!
• Google will help Microsoft get its groove back.

Not intentionally, of course. Microsoft seems to have been flailing in the face of huge shifts in the tech business, many of them led by Google. In November, Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates issued his much-publicized "sea change" memo, calling for the troops to rally the way they did when Microsoft felt challenged by Netscape a decade ago.

"What runs Microsoft's engine is having a competitor stand up and moon them," says author Geoffrey Moore, whose new book is Dealing with Darwin: How Great Companies Innovate at Every Phase of Their Evolution. "Google is mooning them."

Now that that's official, we might see Microsoft back on the attack in '06. Unless Google does to Microsoft what Microsoft once did to Netscape. "The biggest problem for Microsoft is that Microsoft sells what Google gives away," Moore says, which hearkens back to the day when Netscape was selling what Microsoft could give away.

I thought this was worth posting, as Google is near and dear to Foosh's heart, for some strange reason.....GO MSFT!
The article is below if anybody is interested in reading it....

  "Is our children learning?"
Definitely not in Kansas, where they successfully redefined science to include supernatural explanations of natural phenomena. From that article:
"This is a great day for education. This is one of the best things that we can do. This absolutely teaches more about science," said Steve E. Abrams, the Kansas board chairman who shepherded the conservative Republican majority that overruled a 26-member science committee and turned aside the National Academy of Sciences and the National Science Teachers Association.
Wow. What an insidious, evil statement. More brainwashing, please! Hooray!

At least someone set the record straight for those poor, confused Kansas schoolkids:
"This is a sad day, not only for Kansas kids, but for Kansas," said Janet Waugh, who voted against the new standards. "We're becoming a laughingstock, not only of the nation, but of the world."
A laughingstock indeed.

Thankfully some people in Dover have a clue about the difference between science and religion. According to the judge's decision:
"Any asserted secular purposes by the board are a sham and are merely secondary to a religious objective," he said.
Hello, intelligent design people? Are you listening?
Let there be....

  David Letterman sends mind bullets
i <3 crazy people.
"Attorneys for television talk show host David Letterman want a judge to quash a restraining order granted to a Santa Fe woman who contends the celebrity used code words to show that he wanted to marry her and train her as his co-host..... She said he asked her to be his wife during a televised "teaser" for his show by saying, "Marry me, Oprah." Her letter said Oprah was the first of many code names for her, and that the coded vocabulary increased and changed with time. "
Tuesday, December 20
  So dark in here
Winter solstice lights turned off.
  The christmas lights
Since we don't have any hardcore jews in this group (Mei and Sara are definitely not hardcore), I'm going to say it
Monday, December 19
  Quote of the Day
Name the actors that said this:

"You think a hothead like you can come in and change everything?"
"At least I never gave up hope"
Sunday, December 18
  Brokeback storyboard

We saw Brokeback Mountain today. For those of you who havent seen it, I have condensed the absurdly long, tedious film into a comic for simple digestion. (Click to enlarge)
So I saw Dharma (I forget the actress's real name) of Dharma and Greg is getting a new TV show on CBS. I can't believe they'd give that bitch a new TV show. But aparently someone liked Dharma and Greg, its reruns are still running in syndication, afterall. That got me wondering: what are everyone's top 5 worst syndicated sitcoms of all-time?


5. Friends
4. King of Queens
3. According to Jim
2. Dharma and Greg
1. Everybody Loves Raymond

PS: my rankings are not based solely on which is absolutely worst, it also factors popularity. In other words, it's a ranking of which syndicated sitcoms have done the most "damage". Friends cracks the top 5 not just because it is so overrated but because of all the terrible terrible spinoffs that it has inspired as well.
  Is there anything this guy CAN'T do?
Saturday, December 17
  I <3 High School Shit
Hey, remember when you were cool and did the stupid questionaires in high school? I'm sure glad that phase is over...

1. Library Student Help
2. Classified Ad Taker
3. Student
4. Mortgage Equity Research (guh)

1. Groundhog Day
2. Back to the Future I & II
3. Lost in Translation
4. You Got Served

1. Anyang, Korea
2. Buffalo, NY
3. St. Louis, MO
4. -

1. Arrested Development
2. Seinfeld
3. Pardon the Interruption
4. Fresh Prince

1. Rome
2. Phouket, Thailand
3. Miami
4. Vegas

*I "work". I have like 100 websites I visit daily to numb the pain.

1. Ginormous burritos (no brokeback)
2. Corn dogs
3. Pointers chicken pizza
4. Bibimbap

1. Vancouver
2. Miami
3. LA
4. Korea (minus that whole being stationed near the DMZ thing)
Friday, December 16
  human caricatures

I <3 worth1000

That is all.
  Why I Love Rasheed Wallce: Part I of ?

Detroit Pistons

The Bulls didn't find Rasheed Wallace's antics amusing the last time these two met. There could be friction when they meet again on Dec. 16th. (Jonathan Daniel / Getty Images)

Look for some possible fireworks when the Pistons and Bulls meet tonight. The Bulls are mad that Rasheed Wallace was laughing, smiling and talking smack when they met on Dec. 3. Wallace even called "bank" on a shot before hitting it off the glass. Scott Skiles said he would have "done something about it" had he been playing.

He actually did that in a game, and that is why Rasheed is sweet.
  CUTE OVERLOAD: Appropriate Pre-Brokeback Entertainment

How many links can I rip off of boing boing? Just watch me.


<3<3<3 ^_^ ^o^ It's like baby kittens with bunny ears wearing Hello Kitty costumes wrapped in pink fleece blanket dancing with My Little Pony and Carebears, except the pony is a unicorn and the bears are...even more creepy. ^_^ ^o^ <3<3<3

This just screams Johnny to me. Of course, then again, female orgasms scream Johnny to me...
  Killing is fun..

When I say kill, I'm not advocating murder, just the death of their public life, who will be the first to ID all three quotes in my poll?
  Oh, If Only Johnny was a Scientist.....

  in honor of mike and leebs ... and because i hate biochem ... and myself

awwww awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Thursday, December 15
  The answer is: 42
I'm so relieved they finally solved the mysterious smile of the Mona Lisa.
I had always estimated that she was about 62% happy. Dang, I was way off.
  Chuck Norris Sighting at Company Christmas Party
So, the company that I work for had a Christmas party last week. I was absolutely terrified when I saw this [see picture]. Luckily, I made it out in one piece. Some others, unfortunately, weren't so lucky. Needless to say, this is probably the last thing the guy taking the picture saw before he was met with gruesome roundhouse kick-related death.
  Further proof that bread is the best conduit to god
Hey, remember when Jesus and the Virgin Mary were totally awezome?

I'm sure most people have seen this already.
I am, as you may know, colorblind.
The only reason I mention this is that I'm in control of the color scheme on this site and what I have up now looks ok to me but honestly I can't tell blue from purple or red from brown from green (etc. etc.) and therefore may not be the right person to ask. So, I'm asking you. Most of you probably couldn't care less, but if you DO happen to have a brilliant color/layout/design idea, I'd love to hear it.
Tuesday, December 13
  Oh and another thing
Mei and I decided that Jon Stewart is the best jew ever. This clip is hilarious. Watch as he makes Bill O'reilly look like a complete asshole. (not that that's hard but still...)
  "Walker told me I have AIDS"
I had this on my away message briefly but I figured it would be worth posting. It's part of a Conan episode where he shows a rather interesting Walker Texas Ranger clip..
  New York Chicago!?
After a tiring day at work, I found myself stumbling through holiday shoppers to get to my bus stop. I don't know if this is true for any of you, but when I get into that 'zombie' mode things begin to register slower. I walk by an annoying guy on a phone, a stressed out mom, another annoying guy on the phone, fat guy dressed like frosty the snow man, and a few more holiday shoppers whhhhaaaaaaat? Yes, a fat guy was in the trademark, animated Frosty top hat with the red scarf thrown round his neck, though instead of being made of snow, he just had red pajamas on. Acceptable substitute? No, no not really. I am thankful a group of small children weren't travelling with him, things were sketchy enough. But this guy walks up to two other guys and interrupts their conversation, saying--"Now that's New York's finest steed!" As he says this, he points with his cane at the top of some building...where a horse presumably was, I guess. And I guess it must have been pretty fine, maybe even the finest, though I got the feeling ole Frosty was a bit taken with exaggeration.

Side story: Last night at Carmela's Authentic Mexican...

Me: "I'll have the carne molida tacos, but hold everything except the lettuce and cheese."

Mexican guy: "No tomatos? Or tomatos?"

Me: "No, just the lettuce, beef, and cheese."

Mexican guy: "Chooly chooloose?"

Me: "Uh...wait what? No...?"

Mexican guy: *nods*

Ten minutes later...

Me: "Shit, he put everything on this fucking taco."

White guy behind me: "Looks like someone forgot to order their tacos chooly chooloose!"

Ok so I added this last exchange, between me and the miscellaneous white guy, but I think it serves to emphasize the point that I hate that damn mexican place and will never go back.
  I hate you homo batman
The worst part about opening a link at work to watercolor pictures of batman and robin masturbating is saying to yourself 'oh, god, i've seen this before.'

Oh yeah, Hi, i'm on this now. Am I supposed to keep this clean? In that case, just delete the link above.

oh. I totally didn't post the graphic not-work safe one: here it is.
  I think this calls for...
drink from your bowl!!!
sorry, i couldn't resist. i love this picture. (i'm gonna assume you're not one of the "i don't want my picture posted" people ... like ben "take one for the team" hsu over there.)
Monday, December 12
  The Dude Abides

Johnny and I are procrastinating and watching the Big Lebowski. We began wondering, which character is the BEST character in this great movie.

Saturday, December 10
  Flash adventuring
play Samorost 2
A cross between the surrealistic Myst and the point-and-click flash game Crimson Room, Samorost 2 is an excellent waste of 30-40 minutes of your time. Just click the picture to play...

The story begins thus: One night while sleeping in your tower, you are rudely awakened to see that aliens have stolen your dog! A surrealistic, puzzle-laden search and rescue mission ensues. The art is excellent and the soundtrack's eerie ambience sets a perfect tone for this mysterious adventure through space...

The original Samorost is slightly less polished (and shorter and easier) than Samorost 2, but it's probably worth checking out as well. (If you're really bored, that is.)
  To science
I'm so burnt out, but at least my ol' buddy Edgar understands...
To Science

Science! True daughter of Old Time thou art!
Who alterest all things with thy peering eyes.
Why preyest thou thus upon the poet's heart,
Vulture, whose wings are dull realities?

- Poe

Talk about dull realities... Maybe that's why I've turned into a procrastinator extraordinaire--to avoid the reality that I should be studying like nobody's business.
I suppose there are worse forms of escapism...
  "你好,爱人!" - Shampoo

صان انطهنع رعاد تحيس؟؟؟!
ى صعرتاينلط صان'ت
يت'س ين ارابيص

早乙女 乱馬+天道 あかね?

If you can't see the characters, see thumbnail below.
Friday, December 9
  New Poll
Why am I being mentioned? I have not been mean to you, Foosh. But now that you've mentioned it. BRING IT ON!!!!!

*contacting russian squirrels...*
Cute squirrelie
Russian squirrel pack 'kills dog'
Squirrels have bitten to death a stray dog which was barking at them in a Russian park, local media report.
Passers-by were too late to stop the attack by the black squirrels in a village in the far east, which reportedly lasted about a minute.

They are said to have scampered off at the sight of humans, some carrying pieces of flesh.
full story...
  As long as Johnny is the topic of conversation...
i thought i'd post a pic of the day:

usually johnny dances to Aha, but in this picture, he is dancing purely to his own drunkeness.

anyone recognize when this is from? Ben? Jeremiah?? Johnny???
Thursday, December 8
  Johnny has found love...

and his name is Simon, and he's a magical man, an AFRICAN man.
While sitting here drinking my taro milk bubble tea, I realized I'm not even sure what taro is. Yeah, I've heard it's a root and whatever, but that just wasn't doing it for me.
  Japan's Secret Civil War & The Future of RPGs
Hello. I'd first like to say, whoever made this program can suck my nuts. I understand it now, thanks to Foosh, but it's truly quite fucked. The list of people that I must punch upon introduction grows daily.

Ok, so I've noticed, in recent years of playing console video games, that Japan is at war with itself. How, you say? Fine question, wars are serious. But not this one...that is, it is and it isn't. This war threatens the once proud culture that gave us sushi, samurai, and a great language to imitate and joke around with. You see, homosexuality is a significant force in Japan. Well ok it's less of a force and more of an alien bodysnatcher. And unfortunately it seems to be the 'creative' heads of Japan's video game industry that have been possessed entirely. Games like Final Fantasy X, FFX-2, Dragon Quest VIII, and Shining Force Neo all have things in common: the main character is a bitch. This is even literally true for FFX-2, which stars a naive priestess turned singer (what?) on a quest to find her dead boyfriend so she can spread her legs for him. It's a quest to be a whore, and it mimics the struggle of a growing number of Japanese men, trying to express their inner woman (sexually). The trend has been visible for a while, you can tell this war has raged for some time. In FFVIII we find ourselves in control of the manic-depressed Squall, an attempt at a badass that fails completely in that you soon get the feeling he'd rather lie in a bathtub full of ice cubes while listening to Coldplay, than kill the evil force trying to kill the people unfortunate enough to be his friends. Even so, one can find the dark, bi-polar moodiness of our protagonist slightly intriguing. This is not the case for Shining Force Neo, where the main character is irredemable. After two years of military training, he returns home to find it in the greatest of perils. Does he tap the years of training? No, he instead has a tantrum when he visits his father, fails to grasp basic concepts in under five minutes (wait...oh NO! Those fire monsters are going to set the town on fire...the town is in danger!) Holy shit the voice acting for that game is so physically hurts. It's not funny bad...just really really bad.

Dragon Quest VIII isn't so bad, I guess, though I wish the main character would give a shit on occasion. His people are cursed, his king is an ungrateful midget that verbally abuses him, the priest that just joined the party is hitting on his woman, and in the past hour of play people have threatened to shank and torture him. He stared ahead blankly, with the look of slight concern a person gets when they think someone might have said something to them, but they were totally not listening. The only time he bats a fucking eye is when someone attacks him. Then he'll whip out the sword, get all serious looking (I doubt he ever knows what's going on), and kicks more ass than small pox. The only way I can play the game without losing my mind at the absurdity of it, is by pretending that the main character is really, really stoned. Constantly. Unless Japan gives U.S. gamers narcotics to take with their games, the world of RPGs could be witnessing its first Dark Age.
  Fuck you guys
That poll is total bullshit. Where's the studying for finals option? Wheres the playing World of Warcraft option? Obviously there is an unfair bias in this poll. This poll is about as scientific as my nuts. Oh and for the 66% of you who apparently think Im a porno junkie, I'd tell you to fuck off, but im too busy jerking it.
  Ideas, please
So I've been working to improve the look of the site a bit. I also added some links that I chose pretty much at random...if someone has other ideas for links or things to put in that right column let me know and I'll add them.
Sweet. I am here because I keep getting distracted when I'm supposed to be studying. Thanks a lot, Tony. Anyway, this sounds like a good idea, so let's write lots of shit on here.
  Hello all
What's up, bitches? Tis the season. Happy Kwanza! Well, I have an exam this morning, so I'm spending my time very wisely right now. But I just wanted to say hi. Sounds like a cool idea, Foosh. I actually had this idea of posting a random "picture of the day" on my website (cuz there are so many gems ...), but it got buh-leted! So, perhaps we can do that here. You know, stir up some nostalgia for the wustl :)
so i guess i should post something. ummmm... what foosh said. happy christmapalooza to all.
Wednesday, December 7
  Not xmas colors...
By popular demand (damn you Tony) we're all enjoying a lovely WUSTL-themed color scheme. (Ok, he was only joking when he suggested that.....)
  Who knows
I just thought I'd break the ice and be the first non-Foosh poster..
  Where is this headed?
Well, I don't really know. Hopefully it will be an interesting way to share ideas, events, rants, et cetera. If you know the crazy mug in charge of this thing and want to be added as a contributor, just post a comment to this message letting us know how to contact you (email).

Oh, and a happy christmahanukwanzakah to you all.

A community blog, message board, think tank, toaster oven, and who knows what else...


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